my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I just found puke in my bra..
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
