he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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