I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
