Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Randomize
