i don't plan on having that self control this summer
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize