How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
We got so high we made milksteak
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
