Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Church boner. Awkwardddd
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
