Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
