I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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