I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
