Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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