So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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