Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
