it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Everyone says I win the strip club
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
