people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
