I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
