GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize
