I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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