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• (443): View more from Maryland

  her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.

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• (337): View more from Louisiana

  if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?

  (1-337): View more from Louisiana

  4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  mom cant say that college never taught us math

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• (218): View more from Minnesota

  Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  You know how I know you're gay?

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• (516): View more from New York

  my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.

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• (949): View more from California

  He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.

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• (218): View more from Minnesota

  I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.

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• (850): View more from Florida

  I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb

  Fav 4 1054 543

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.

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• (718): View more from New York

  I'm gonna cum garlic butter

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• (478): View more from Georgia

  That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.

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• (830): View more from Texas

  Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.

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• (916): View more from California

  I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals

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