I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
