i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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