this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
should my penis look like a turkey
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
