just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
