I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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