I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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