Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
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