Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize