she was so not down for the gang bang
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
