she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
