Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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