You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Randomize