he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
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