If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
