I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize