butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
