how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize
