Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
It's shark week go big or go home
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
