how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
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