Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
i out mim tonsoeep
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