I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
