If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize