How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
