just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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