He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize