...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
