i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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