They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
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