Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
The Olympian is in my bed
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
