I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize
