They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
